: It's decided then. Boontaker, get the men packed up and ready to march.
: Aye, s-
: Sir, I must protest.
: Noted.
: Captain, without us many will die. We cannot leave them!
: With us, many will still die and we probably will too. We're not ready. Get ready for the march, Turtle.
: My Lord-!
: ENOUGH! Another word and I'll leave you here to defend them alone!
: Lord...? What was that ab- NNNGGHAAAAAH THE EIGHTH HAVE FLANKED US TURN THE LEGION TURN NOW-
Whiteshark quickly walks up to OnTilt and gives him a sharp slap.
: <red with anger> How dare you, plebian! Insulting an Honor Guard is... is...
OnTilt's eyes widen slightly.
: Whiteshark? It cannot... where-?
: Calm thyself,
brother. 'Twas but a fit, and I wakened thee from it.
: Y-yes. Yes, of course. Our kit. We should make ready.
As the Turtles complete preparations for the march, Kalarion closes out negotiations with the mayor.
: The Turtles will not take this contract. In another month or two, with better weapons, I'd risk it. As it stands we'd just be slaughtered along with everyone in this town.
: Well. The women will live awhile longer.
: I advise you to have everyone pack necessities and head into the mountains. Let the Orcs have the run of the town, let them plunder and burn. It can all be rebuilt.
: You don't come back from death.
The Turtles head to Salzfels. OnTilt's dings are taken care of:
He takes Student and Pathfinder for his perks. Next up, Boontaker:
He takes Nine Lives for his perk (the requested Fearsome will not be available until next level). The Turtles begin marching for Waidhof. Along the way:
: Sir, northmen on the road.
: What are we looking at?
: Pack of Thralls, I think. They've got some hounds with them but not much else.
: Easy prey. We'll bite. Let's go.
: Aye sir.
The numbers are a little deceptive. 4 of the 11 are dogs. It's an unremarkable massacre with unremarkable loot. We get a trade good that may sell for around 250 crowns. The Turtles march on.
The rest of the trip to Waidhof is uneventful. Waidhof itself is selling wood at very close to at-cost, a good opportunity for us. Wood benefits specifically from a couple town conditions, in addition to ambushed routes. Kalarion looks wistfully at the available hires, but with the hard cap on company size reached there's no chance to bring on new Turtles.
: Another time.
There are no contracts avaialble, time to head to Salzfels. Just outside town:
: Raiders, sir. They're burning and looting the salt mines.
: This close to Riedland? Unusually bold.
: Not that kind of Raider sir. Thurah soldiers.
: Ah. Well, that was quick.
Noble Wars (and indeed, all crises) result in dramatically increased raiding of towns and villages. We'll be seeing a lot of this until the war is over. We might even be doing it ourselves
: Hmmm. I want to take those bastards but I don't think the time is right. Let's see if Weilburg is ready to hire mercenaries for the war.
The Turtles head into town, ignoring both (!!) raiding parties for now.
This isn't a great place to sell stuff right now. The available Noble contract is old and won't help us clear the Raided Settlement condition. Kalarion checks the available town contract. It's a hunting contract with an 1,160 payout. The men are lined up for battle:
: Well sir, I found them.
: What have we got?
: Webknechts. A LOT of webknechts.
: How many did you say?!
: Form up, men, we'll take them in the mountains.
: That's my decision. But I approve. Direct the men.
That's a lot of webknechts. But they start on the low ground and never really stood a chance. It's another simple slaughter. The only notable aspects of the fight are getting 4 webs and a trade good as loot, and the fact that 1998 whiffed seemingly every single shot during the fight.
The Turtles head back for their pay. Fodder gets a level. After a lot of consideration (he's not really built for any particular role), he takes the Rotation perk. The contract completion clears Disappearing Villagers. The Noble contract is still the holdover from before.
: No other work for us, Count Helfrich? Nothing related to the current... troubles?
: Weilburg is perfectly capable of handling such business itself, sellsword. Do not concern yourself.
: <looking out the window> Your fields are in flames.
: And we will put them out. Your service is paid for. Good day.
: Of course, m'Lord.
...
: Form the men up. Let's head to Riedland.
: Aye sir.
Ambushed routes in a big trading city!
: Don't mind if we do!
As hoped, our trade goods sell for a mint, bringing us firmly into the black. 1998 visits the Taxidermist:
Direwolf Pelt Mantles are great, especially for men in light armor, as they don't penalize fatigue. The resolve penalty to opponents in melee is also nice, especially against bandits and greenskins. I thought about giving this one to Eyestabber, but ended up going with Whiteshark instead for the simple reason that I don't want to waste a mantle on a Mail Hauberk, when we have heavier armor available.
Kalarion heads to check on the contracts. The two-star is another hunt, this time for 900 crowns. We take it. Before heading out to track down our quarry, Kalarion takes care of some long overdue business.
: Greetings, sir! I am Ibn Al-Wadi, famed barber and apothecary, learned in the doctrines of the Gilder and skilled in the use of the knife and the saw! What is your desire?
: Hello Ibenezer. My men and I are doubtless going to be swept up in the turbulent events of the Middle kingdoms, and we're going to need someone to patch us up.
: Certainly! Bring any wounded to me and I will be happy to display my skills. For the right price.
: Yes... tell me. What do you charge?
: The price varies, but generally 150 crowns per session.
: What would you say to getting more than 20 times that? Right now?
: <looking coolly at Kalarion> I would think someone was about to try to gull me.
: Touche. But no, not this time. I want to put you on retainer.
: ...I'm listening.
: 3,000 crowns now, and half a percent stake in the company.
: WHAT?! My skills for such a paltry sum?! Absolutely not, my harem would last a week! No, it cannot be borne.
: Anything can be borne, for the right price. I believe we're close to yours, but be warned! I will not be taken for an easy mark.
The two settle down to haggle for an hour or two, finally arriving at 3,500 crowns. Business completed, the Turtles head out for another hunt.
: Should be an easy catch, sir. I only counted 8, and nothing special about them.
: Excellent. Catch them up and let's be finished with this.
Along the way, an interesting opportunity presents itself:
: No mercy. Kill them all.
: Yay!
There are only 7 men in the camp. Yet again it's a quick slaughter that doesn't warrant a description. We get a trade good and **** loot out of it. At least we cleared a camp that would have grown over time, and OnTilt dinged:
He takes Backstabber for his perk.
More interestingly, while we were slaughtering that camp a sizeable group with a spicy composition shows up:
: Looks like the leader of that camp was out, sir. He's returning now.
: Excellent!
: Head to the forest to the north, and let's make sure to leave obvious tracks?
: It's like you have ESPN!
: wat
Along the way, we pick up the trail of our quarry again, but no time for that now. The Turtles head for the forest and await the angry bandit leader's group:
...and get put into an ambush ourselves. Gay.
: Dammit! Get in position and hurry!
This is a ****** position. The bandits are coming from all directions, meaning I can't concentrate force. Worse, I can't see most of them, so I don't know where to send my heavy hitters yet. On the bright side, the first shots from the Marksmen miss. 1998 misses his shots too, though. In fact, all our ranged attacks miss. The rest of the round involves moving into whatever position we can find. Cogemeister, Gerey, Eyestabber and Nemesis form an impromptu wall to the south, while Whiteshark moves to block the chokepoint in the north, keeping a lumberjack Raider away from Irenaeus. OnTilt moves to the other side on the north, spearwalling to prevent Raiders from pouring out of the forest passage.
Kalarion moves to support OnTilt, ending the first round:
The Marksmen open with a shot that lands a hit on Nemesis:
And here we see the benefits of Full Metal Jackets. Just 20 days ago a crossbow shot would have hurt, possibly caused an injury and could have been deadly on a headshot. This time it barely scratches Nemesis. The javelin Raider's shot at Eyestabber has an even smaller effect, scratching his armor and doing less than 5 HP of damage. Gerey moves south to tie up another javelin Raider. He misses his swing, but it sets 1998 to step up behind him and slam a javelin through his neck. Hauberk has nothing but bad shooting options right now. He takes a long shot and misses.
: Ahhhh, the best place to be. Behind a wall of iron. Whiteshark, watch this!
: Impressive work, Irenaeus. My compliments.
: Yes, I am really a remarkable shot. It's so nice to have it noted.
: OnTilt, go help the others. I can handle this passage myself.
: By your will, sir.
: That sounds... different.
: Command my manner of speech and I will obey.
: That's not what I meant. And since when did you care about my opinion on matters like that?
But OnTilt is already heading south. Here I've made a tactical mistake. I should have sent OnTilt to support Whiteshark and Iren, and more importantly, provide a blocker for Boontaker. Instead I sent him to help with the javelin Raider:
The next round, the enemy Marksmen make small moves and continue to miss their shots. The southern Marksman notably fires off a shot in charging distance from Eyestabber. If we can kill the sword-and-board Raider he'll be free to slaughter the Marksman in a turn or two. More worryingly, a pair of Raiders close in on Irenaeus from the east.
: Um. Pardon, sir Boontaker. I am distressingly close to engaging in melee.
: Yes, I am distressingly close to the same.
Boontaker waits on his action. My intent is that Irenaeus will fire off a single javelin, then withdraw behind Boontaker. Boontaker will step up behind Whiteshark to help finish off the lumberjack Raider, then wait for Fodder to come north to kill off the spear Raider. Meanwhile 1998 lands another shot on the sword-and-board Raider, followed by Nemesis smashing the Raider into oblivion.
: Sweet Anselm this sword is great.
: Oh hello mr. Marksman
The lumberjack Raider swings on Whiteshark and whiffs.
: I laugh at thee, knave! Perhaps another try?
Gerey moves to the remaining javelin Raider with a cheeky plan in mind. With Iren's turn I find out I've made yet ANOTHER mistake. I assumed he'd be able to move two hexes after firing off a javelin, because normally, he can. Unfortunately we're in a forest, and he doesn't have pathfinder. My plan from earlier is now in shambles. Angry and a little panicked, I make mistake++:
: Uh, ahem, apparently I cannot get past you, uh, terribly sorry.
: Pull out your melee weapon and shield then!
: Weeeeeelll...
: DAMMIT. Move aside.
Boontaker moves forward to protect Iren, popping Adrenaline Rush. With no shield, and no ability to disengage. This is a problem. Kalarion moves to position to face off with the spear Raider up north. OnTilt gets in position to support Gerey. Fodder moves to support Eyestabber and Nemesis, with Cogemeister rushing forward to cover him. We finally discover the leader:
Eyestabber rushes the crossbow Marksman.
: You're going to squeal like a pig when I'm done with you, ******.
The next round, Boontaker whiffs. The crossbow Marksman whips out his dagger but whiffs his attack, panicked by Eyestabber's rush. Meanwhile the northern Marksman moves forward and fires off a bolt at Irenaeus, headshotting him for over half his health!
: AUGH!
: Back out, let 1998 up. Move!
: Aye, sergeant.
The spear Raider immediately goes to work on Boontaker, nearly destroying his armor. He hasn't suffered serious HP damage yet, but he will very soon if something isn't done. The Leader, now revealed, immediately charges forward. He's not in range yet but he will be, and that hammer is a nightmare. At least Gerey is having success, having implemented his cheeky plan:
: When sturm und drang are insufficient zere is always the battering ram, ja
: Well swung!
Gerey immediately moves to occupy the now-free high ground. Hauberk recaptures the magic with a shot from down town, piercing the northern spear Raider's leg on a 29% hit chance!
: Planned
: Uh huh.
1998 moves to support Irenaeus and Boontaker. Eyestabber fires off a Swing that hits the Marksman but misses the sword-and-board Raider.
: I don't like **** anyway. Nemesis, you want to finish this shitstain off?
Kalarion one-shots the northern spear Raider. He's now free to take the lumberjack Raider and Marksman from the rear. Cogemeister, seeing the approach of the hammer-wielding Leader, immediately Turtles (
) up, saving his stamina to tank hits to the max extent possible. Whiteshark follows suit.
Eyestabber's ***** from last round opens with another pair of frantic whiffs. The lumberjack Raider, finally wising up to the fact Whiteshark is close to unhittable, starts going to work on his shield. The spear Raider on Boontaker thankfully wastes an action shieldwalling, meaning his one hit still doesn't do much yet. A welcome reprieve.
The leader, Bloody Hadebrand, steps up to Cogemeister and lands a long-shot hit, one-shotting his armor!
1998, finally in position, fires off a javelin at the lumberjack Raider that drops his armor to non-existent and his HP to less than half. Nemesis takes Eyestabber up on his offer, beheading the Marksman. Boontaker whiffs again. Gerey does not, landing a head and body shot to crush the javelin Raider!
: ...but sturm und drang are generally sufficient.
: And my spear will finish what you started.
OnTilt finishes the Raider. Fodder lands a cheeky head shot on Hadebrand. It doesn't do a lot of damage yet, but it does put a significant dent in his helmet. Eyestabber tries for a foign to hit the last southern Marksman but, ironically, only hits the sword-and-board Raider. He destroys the armor, laying him bare for Nemesis' followup strike.
: Insolent rapscallion! Thy life is forfeit for the damage to my shield!
Whiteshark immediately works to make good on his word, smashing apart the lumberjack Raider's armor, dropping him to critical HP and his morale to Breaking. The next round, the two unengaged Raiders begin backing off, smelling the way the wind is blowing. Both remaining Marksmen miss their shots. The lumberjack Raider continues working on Whiteshark's shield, but he'll need one more split to destroy it. And Kalarion is within attacking range.
Boontaker's opponent finally does real damage this round and it's a doozy, dropping him to critical HP with a pierced chest!
: NNGH!
1998, his javelins expended, switches to his warfork and promptly misses. Thankfully Hadebrand misses his attacks as well. Nemesis lands a crushing swing on the sword-and-board Raider, smashing the life from his limbs.
: Hello hammer-***! I've let you pick on my bros long enough! Time for a steel enema!
Boontaker, his panic giving him a rush of focus, lands a good headshot on the spear Raider. Eyestabber, distracted by the naked Marksman, beheads him. Nemesis moves into position for an assault on Hadebrand next round. The spear Raider stabs Boontaker, triggering Nine Lives!
: Not... dead yet...
Another round of whiffs on the spear Raider have me screeching cusses and smashing the mouse. Then, fully in the throes of my frustration, I do something I've never done in Battle Brothers since I first started playing: I aim for a target in melee with one of the Turtles, hoping to take the spear Raider out before it can finish the job on Boontaker:
: In... out... squeeeeze...
: Urgh... now I'm...
: ****! Sergeant!
: What? BOONTAKER!
OnTilt moves to support Eyestabber and Nemesis, flanking Hadebrand. Kalarion, in a rage, demolishes the greatflail Raider and moves to cut off the last remaining free Raider. Gerey, stymied by the logjam up north, rushes south to try to support the fight against Hadebrand. Fodder lands another headshot, destroying his helmet and dropping him to Wavering. Whiteshark has been patiently chipping away at the final Marksman up north, who is now Fleeing and has maybe 2 HP left.
Cogemeister follows up Fodder's headshot with one of his own, dropping Hadebrand to Breaking! Kalarion moves up to the last Raider and headshots him as well! Only the fact the Raider had an unusually beefy helmet saved him, but he's still dropped straight to Breaking by the blow.
OnTilt finishes off the Raider supporting Hadebrand. Fodder lands a vicious body thrust that finally drops Hadebrand to full Fleeing. Nemesis finishes the job. It's basically over at this point. The last remaining Raider holds out stubbornly for another round, managing to bring 1998 to critical HP, but succumbing in the end:
Note the absolute **** condition of over half the Turtles' armor. The fight ended, our surgeon arrives to check on the wounded.
: IBN! IBENEZER! Get over here!
: Here, good sir. You require my assistance?
: He's hurt bad. Got SHOT-!
: ...
I'm sorry
: ...No. We all panic sometimes. But remember this forever. Never make that mistake again.
: Yes, sir.
: Well, doc?
: He will live. But I guarantee nothing the next time. And I couldn't save his finger.
Acceptable. There are much, much worse permanent injuries. Loot:
We're gonna make a shitload of money from that haul. Nice. Cogemeister also dings:
He's coming along nicely. I've decided I'm going to make him a hammerbro, we desperately need good armor-destruction capabilities. In keeping with that, I give him Hammer Specialization. I had a little brain fart here and didn't assign him a surname, I'll take care of that in the next update.
Kalarion dings as well, he's coming close to the soft cap.
Next level he'll surpass 90 melee skill, a big milestone! He takes Recovery for his next perk. Last but not least, Eyestabber dings as well.
For his perk we take Pathfinder, considering how enraging it's been the last several combats to be hindered by rough terrain.
Now that dings for which I have direct control are taken care of, it's time to hunt down our actual quarry.
: Anselm save us, we're in rough shape. Ventilator, our prey wasn't much to speak of, was it?
: No sir. Bunch of Raiders.
: Alright. We can move the wounded to the rear on engagement. Let's go.
: Mmmaaah... almost... died...
: Oh shut up pussy, I'm not going to make you fight.
Note the parlous armor level of fully half our line.
: Cogemeister, Ventilator, Nemesis, back off. Irenaeus, do your thing. No melee! Whiteshark, OnTilt, Gerey, hold the line. Nemesis and I are going to go to work.
: Aye!
: I have every intention of obeying. But...
: A little parting gift. Hope you enjoy my boss, boys
Boontaker is basically a zombie right now. Thankfully there aren't any Marksmen or he'd be in big trouble. Irenaeus, not to be outdone by 1998, plants a javelin in the northernmost spear Raider's chest and head, completely disregarding the alarming proximity of two other Raiders.
Meanwhile, Hauberk claims first kill, finishing off the Raider that 1998 eviscerated earlier. OnTilt, recognizing the danger of the hammer Raider (who has no shield and therefore bonus damage), moves forward to poke at him and tie him into melee. Gerey abd Whiteshark quickly move in front of Iren, providing the needed cover for his pelting missiles. Kalarion moves to stand with OnTilt against the hammer Raider.
: I hate hammers and let me tell you what that means for you.
Up north, the mace Raider attempts to stun Gerey and fails miserably.
: Mein beautiful looks never fail me, ja
:
The hammer Raider, completely unfazed by the situation and feeling cheeky, smashes Kalarion twice, taking a chunk out of his armor and fully half of his helm's durability. The northern spear Raider does the same to Whiteshark, except of course that he barely nicks Whiteshark's armor. Eyestabber and Nemesis both back up to Kalarion in response to movement south by a pair of Raiders. The Raiders will now have to close within attacking range to engage. We can wait.
: I don't think you understand what my captain was telling you.
Hammer Raider not feeling so good now is he
. Hauberk makes a small adjustment north and tries a shot on the sword-and-board Raider, but misses. Irenaeus, now smugly confident behind his bodyguards, continues pelting the spear Raider, bringing him to critical HP.
OnTilt piles onto the hammer Raider, landing both shots. The Raider is down to less than 5 HP, and is dropped straight to Fleeing by the final hit. Gerey starts bringin' a little Sturm und Drang up top. Cogemeister tries out his new hammer on the central sword-and-board Raider. He misses his first attack, but the second:
: O-oh I like this thing!
Kalarion attempts to remonstrate with the hammer Raider. Instead:
Fodder decides to viciously stab Cogemeister's target. The Raider line isn't looking too good at this point, only the north still showing any signs of strength. Eyestabber moves to the south and wallops one of the Raiders attempting a flank.
: No wonder you're a Raider, you just stand there and take the rape. Couldn't make it as a real man so here you are?
In the middle, OnTilt finishes off both of the almost-dead Raiders.
: Break and flee!
Irenaeus is out of javelins and his pocket weapon is still ****, so he decides to cool his heels in place, waiting on the fight to reach its inevitable conclusion. Kalarion, with the hammer Raider dead, walks south to engage the two with Eyestabber. His presence both of them to Breaking. Boontaker, stumbling like a zombie, still manages to land a killing shot on one of the northern Raiders.
The fight at this point is over. The rest of the Raiders are fleeing and get mopped up, capped off with a beheading by Kalarion. Loot is ****. The Turtles head back for their pay. Unfortunately completing the mission doesn't clear ambushed routes, but on the bright side our junk is still fit to sell. Boontaker gets a visit to the Temple:
: Yay!
Junk sold and wounds treated, it's time to check out the 3-star contract. It's a camp clearance, for over 2000 crowns! Kalarion doesn't hesitate.
: Consider them dead.
On the road just outside town:
: We ourselves have-
: Never seen such a thing, and we would have.
: ...
Moving on, the Turtles approach the camp:
: Disposition?
: Pretty well set up. They've got good fire support as well. It's going to be exciting one way or the other, that's for sure.
: Boontaker, feeling up to setting the men up?
: Yes sir, thanks.
: Irenaeus, Ventilator, you're back here with us on this one. I want you behind the shieldwall the entire fight. Let the big boys rout the Marksmen.
: Aye.
: They outnumber us but they're worthless dogs. Slaughter them all.
: Aye!
The fight starts with the Raiders and Marksmen rushing forward and/or firing as usual, punctuated by a cheeky headshot on Hauberk that rips his ear. Whiteshark has an idea.
: OnTilt! Gerey! Cogemeister! Form a wall!
: Just like the old days, eh brother?
: Was? We've never...
: <grinning> Indeed, brother. Let them crash against the shore!
: And we will see them out on the tide! YAAAH!
: S-sirs?
: What the ****?
: Boontaker, what's going on up there? I heard OnTilt shouting.
: Some gobbledygook, I don't know.
: They never change.
All four bros move forward a step and create the first true shieldwall the Turtles have ever done.
The idea here is simple. These four will permanently shieldwall, drawing fire from the 6 Marksmen plus assorted javelin and axe throwing Raiders, allowing Kalarion and the boys to go to work. They quickly do exactly that, charging forward from the south, intending to roll up the rear of the Raider line. Their leader has come forward, but he's got throwing axes out with no shield. Probably means he's wielding a 2-handed weapon.
1998 takes a calculated risk, moving behind the southern tree, counting on the charge of the heavy hitters to provide distraction while he pelts the fighting line with a clear line of sight.
The plan overall works beautifully, drawing the entire next round's missile fire to the shield wall. Unfortunately OnTilt takes a stray headshot that nearly kills him:
: ARGH! Urgh, still not used to having a shield in hand.
: I look forward to thy roaming the battlefield once your proper weapon is in hand, brother.
: Get back, you're not going to be able to hold the line in that condition.
: I will obey, sergeant. But not yet.
He spends the remainder of the round dodging another half dozen missiles. The flail Raider peels off to the south, hoping to head off Kalarion's crew.
: Nemesis. Eyestabber.
: One Raider kebab coming right up, captain.
They immediately engage and flank the flail Raider. Irenaeus sends his first two javelins flying downrange, hitting both a Raider and their leader. OnTilt, his role fulfilled, backs out of the fight. Kalarion, deciding that he's better used for now to help the boys, takes up position by Eyestabber. Cogemeister coolly moves to fill the hole left by OnTilt and re-shieldwalls.
1998 makes a just-as-planned, missing his target but hitting a nearby Marksman instead.
This round proceeds much as the last, with the Marksmen firing futilely at the shieldwall. One arrow manages to hit Fodder, but it does negligible damage and he shrugs it off. Now it's time to take care of the flail Raider.
: You really think that shield is going to save you?
: Nah
Eyestabber, want some easy meat?
: I do love a good cut of squealing pig. Thanks, bro!
: Show me what you've learned, Eyestabber.
: Aye sir. HAAAA-AAAH!
: M'boy <wipes a tear from his eye>
: I did it!!
Irenaeus throws his last javelin, landing another shot on the sword Raider up front. 1998 does the same, landing a hail-mary headshot on one of the sword-and-board Raiders! It doesn't do much yet but nevertheless encourages the men. Gerey chips away at the northern flail Raider's armor. Kalarion pops a Swing but completely whiffs (I may or may not have smashed the mouse on my desk when it happened). Fodder lands a shot on Gerey's target, completely annihilating his armor!
Whiteshark goes the steady route, using his actions to destroy the Raider's shield. He's a little more dangerous now, but completely exposed to followup attack, especially with no armor. Unfazed, the Raider immediately rotates out. Not a problem though, we'll get to him eventually. At this point, one of the Marksmen lands a second headshot on Hauberk. This one really hurts and he now has two injuries.
: Hauberk, out!
: Yes sergeant, ngh.
The remaining Marksmen focus on Hauberk but aren't able to get past the shieldwall. The leader (revealed as Black Eyes Einhart) puts his throwing sheaf away and pulls out his weapon:
Ooooooh, boy. This could be trouble. Luckily he won't be able to attack for another two rounds, having wasted this turn pulling out his enormous axe. Nemesis kills the flail Raider with a Swing, freeing Eyestabber up temporarily. Boontaker, seeing an advancing mace Raider that appears to be trying to reach the back lines, throws out a quick poke that deals significant armor damage and then withdraws. 1998 throws his last javelin at the Raider but misses. He switches to his warfork and moves to support Nemesis and Eyestabber.
Speaking of, Eyestabber steps forward to help with Nemesis' new target. But unfortunately this Raider has shieldwall up and Eyestabber misses on a very low hit chance.
: Faugh! Out of ammo again! Fine, I'll just poke that lout to death.
: ...oops!
Unfortunately Irenaeus forgot that he doesn't have Quick Hands, so stepping forward means he's in melee but can't attack
I really need to fix that problem for both of the thrower bros. Gerey, now completely gassed by the constant shieldwalling, fires off a single swing that misses. Hauberk now withdraws in good order from the fight, while Fodder lands another shot on the sword Raider! He withdraws after his hit, not wanting to give the mace Raider a free shot.
Kalarion wrecks the sword-and-board Raider he's facing, bringing him to low HP, destroying his armor and giving him a nasty injury. Whiteshark opts for a shieldwall vice attacking the sword Raider, hoping to still draw the attention of the Marksmen next round.
Sure enough, the mace Raider rushes up to Boontaker. Fortunately he used most of his AP on the charge, meaning no attacks this round. Boontaker immediately responds.
: Back off ******.
He tops it off by popping Adrenaline Rush, fully intending to kill the Raider next round. Irenaeus's flail Raider meanwhile smashes him in the chest twice, nearly destroying his armor.
: Time to get in the action.
Black Eyes takes an unexpected tack, using all his AP to move to the center of the field. My best guess is that he intends to flank our shieldwall.
: You must have mistaken me for someone who doesn't know how to spit you on this sticker. Let me provide your final lesson in life.
: You know, I wish some of you were "warrior wahmen", I'd love to drag you back to camp for a fun time. Oh well, I'll have to content myself with watching your head spin.
: Wheeee!
Nemesis calmly smashes his sword-and-board Raider target, dropping him straight to Breaking and severely injuring him. Gerey, gathering his breath, takes a final slash that drops the last frontline Raider. With that death, the Marksmen are nearly completely exposed. Fodder meanwhile finishes off the mace Raider, who did exactly ****-all before getting killed.
Hauberk fires off a shot at Black Eyes but misses. He withdraws another step to stay out of range of a charge. Kalarion unfortunately misses his swing as well, leaving him tied up for another round. Whiteshark rushes forward, tying up one of the Marksmen and the last sword-and-board Raider (there were a lot of them in this fight. Cogemeister, recognizing his potential danger in the wake of Black Eyes' charge, takes unusual action:
: E-excuse me, mr. Raider, but I need to move a bit.
Raider: Oh, no you do- wha?!
: Excellent shieldwork, Cogemeister! We shall make a wall of thee yet!
: T-thanks sir!
Success! The tactical retreat allows us one more round of freedom from massive axe swings. Boontaker would potentially be threatened but his Adrenaline Rush guarantees he'll be able to move to safety next round. The Marksmen, impatient to hit targets, make a big mistake: they charge forward.
Boontaker quickly takes advantage of his Rush to get behind Cogemeister's shield. The Marksmen are mostly in disarray right now, but one gets off a shot on Irenaeus that brings him dangerously low. He'll have to withdraw from the fight as well. Luckily he dodges the next missile.
1998 finally lands a shot with his warfork, killing Nemesis' Raider and freeing Nemesis and Eyestabber to charge the Marksmen! Nemesis' approach drops Whiteshark's Marksman to Fleeing. Eyestabber gets behind Whiteshark's sword-and-board Raider, threatening all remaining Marksmen with vicious disembowelment.
Irenaeus withdraws to the north, while Whiteshark destroys the shield of the (now) sword Raider. With Eyestabber on the Raider's rear it's only a matter of time. Kalarion finally kills his target, then uses the Berserk charge to rush back in support of Nemesis.
Fodder takes an action that polearm bros are infamous for. He steps forward and annihilates Black Eyes' armor with a thrust. Then he retreats back to his old spot, keeping himself out of immediate danger of attack! The extra AP from polearm mastery is a huge lifesaver sometimes. Hauberk fires another shot but misses again. With Black Eyes this close he can't risk a reload, he needs to fully withdraw.
Cogemeister and Boontaker both withdraw, and then like a ****** I waste Boontaker's fatigue on another Adrenaline Rush!
: Mein sergeant...?
: Shut up I was excited!
Round 7 is a litany of panicked whiffs from the now-melee Marksmen, followed by Nemesis and Eyestabber casually wrecking their targets. Black Eyes moves to engage the polearm bros and Cogemeister. Next round he'll be able to Round Swing, we need him dead yesterday.
Gerey, forgetting that he's in melee, attempts to move to further surround Black Eyes, but takes a ZOC hit for his trouble. He retaliates with a headshot slash, which doesn't do much but will set him up for next round. The cleaver Raider attempts a pair of decapitates that both miss. Kalarion steps up and Swings on the clear Raider and a Marksman, hitting both and dropping them to Fleeing. Black Eyes and a single measely Marksman with a **** bow are the only two bandits left who can actually fight.
Fodder lands a hit on Black Eyes but it's unfortunately a headshot against an untouched helmet, meaning no significant HP damage. Cogemeister lands a hammerblow that cracks Black Eyes' hand, and Boontaker triggers his Nine Lives and pierces his kidney. But he's not dead yet.
The next round, Black Eyes lets off his Round Swing:
Boontaker is in a bad way, but Gerey quickly moves to Black Eyes. The continued envelopment finally breaks Black Eyes' morale, and he drops to Fleeing. Gerey dispatches him with a slash.
The fight is over. Loot:
Nice! That axe is probably the most damaging non-famed human weapon in the game. It was going to be asf's ultimate goal before his untimely dispatchening.
Irenaeus and 1998, tired of running out of javelins mid-fight, both make adjustments. They each take an extra sheaf of javelins, and Irenaeus also picks up a Pike, wanting the extra damage and good hit chance over his earlier spear.
The Turtles head back to Riedland for their payout. The 2060 bounty is enough to cover the cost of restocking on food, tools and medicine, as well as a trip to the Temple.
: Yay!
Business completed, the Turtles head back to Salzfels. They're still suffering from raided settlement and ambushed routes, with the addition of rebuilding effort, which skyrockets the selling price of wood. Kalarion checks on the Noble contract. It's a camp clearance for a greenskin camp, faaaar to the west past Eichholz.
: Hmmmmmm...
But for now we take the standard contract, another camp clearance nearby.
: Boontaker, get the men ready to move.
: Aye, sir.
)
